Overall I'm feeling pretty good. I'm driving a bit and riding my bike a lot. My brain is much sharper than it has been these last months. My ability to process qualitative data is improving every day. However processing quantitative data continues to escape me.
My main problem is the hallucinations that plague me at night. When I take my medicine and fall asleep and then wake up after sleeping for a short time I am not in control of my mind. It is like living in a dream, knowing it is not real but not able to convince myself it is not real. It is a strange feeling that I hate and I can't yet find a remedy.
Taking stock of all of it I am happy with the way I feel. I can keep this up.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Monday, September 3, 2012
Ghost in the fog
"Step out the front door like a ghost
Into the fog where no one notices
The contrast of white on white.
And in between the moon and you
The angels get a better view
Of the crumbling difference between wrong and right"
Adam Duritz is fantastic!
Ever feel like a ghost in the fog?
Into the fog where no one notices
The contrast of white on white.
And in between the moon and you
The angels get a better view
Of the crumbling difference between wrong and right"
Adam Duritz is fantastic!
Ever feel like a ghost in the fog?
Life
Life is basically sweet, rewarding and full of joy.
The things we do to each other are what make it miserable, depressive and difficult.
The things we do to each other are what make it miserable, depressive and difficult.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Demons
The better angels of my mind and nature are regularly being shouted down and drowned out by my demons.
As the shouts grow louder the angels recede until there are times that I find that I am the demon shouting.
Hatred, Anger, Revenge; emotions that sustain me.
As the shouts grow louder the angels recede until there are times that I find that I am the demon shouting.
Hatred, Anger, Revenge; emotions that sustain me.
Friday, August 24, 2012
Humor
Some humor on an otherwise humorless and difficult day.
Since I am nearly preparing for next years Tour de France, my wife thought it would be good for me to have a real cycling jersey. Keep in mind that cycling jerseys are not made for people of my, uh, build. So she calls and asks and calls and asks and finds that a XX jersey should fit me. It arrived yesterday.
It fit my arm.
Not every day you can't even get a 2 x shirt over your shoulders. While quite discouraging it was very funny and even funnier when I think about it this morning.
I guess my Tour de France run will have to wait until I can fit into a jersey. Might be a few years.
Since I am nearly preparing for next years Tour de France, my wife thought it would be good for me to have a real cycling jersey. Keep in mind that cycling jerseys are not made for people of my, uh, build. So she calls and asks and calls and asks and finds that a XX jersey should fit me. It arrived yesterday.
It fit my arm.
Not every day you can't even get a 2 x shirt over your shoulders. While quite discouraging it was very funny and even funnier when I think about it this morning.
I guess my Tour de France run will have to wait until I can fit into a jersey. Might be a few years.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Hard things
My wife has a lot of little sayings that she consistently uses with my kids. One of those sayings is "you can do hard things".
In life we are often asked to practice what we preach. I guess we will see if I can do hard things.
In life we are often asked to practice what we preach. I guess we will see if I can do hard things.
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